Literary Thursday: The Lucky One

Oh, happy day... I was able to finish reading another book this month!

For my second Literary Thursday review, I picked a book from an author that I absolutely love, Nicholas Sparks. I loved seeing the movie adaptations but never read any of the novels until last year. I have read eight of his novels so far: The Last Song, The Choice, The Notebook, The Wedding, Message in a Bottle, The Guardian, A Bend in the Road, and the one that I am about to review.

The Lucky One by Nicholas Sparks



Before I started reading the book, I came across a tweet on Nicholas Sparks Twitter account that was discussing his latest novel to film adaptation, which turned out to be this novel. He was sharing character stills of Logan aka. Zac Efron. I immediately realized that I was going to do the same thing that I did with Miley Cyrus for The Last Song, picture the actor as I am reading the book... and that's exactly what I did.


Logan Thibault is a U.S. Marine that is on a quest to find a women in a photograph. He found the photo while on a tour of duty in Iraq and somehow it presented itself as a lucky charm, between winning poker games and surviving several combats (over three different tours). After a fishing trip with his best friend Victor, Logan and his dog Zeus decide to journey to North Carolina (from Colorado) by foot in search of this mystery women. He ends up finding Elizabeth, a divorced mother who lives with her son and grandmother. Logan takes a job at the dog kennel that Elizabeth's grandmother runs (which is on the same land as their home). While Logan and Elizabeth develop feelings for one another (then fall in love), someone is trying to break them apart... Elizabeth's ex-husband, Clayton. Logan tries to keep the secret of the photograph from everyone, which eventually threatens to tear them apart.

As with all of the novels I read by Nicholas Sparks, the book proves how well he can write a great love story with enough twists and turns to keep you guessing (and sometimes you won't be able to predict what will happen next). The story of Logan and Elizabeth was predictable, but the other people involved in their lives made things complicated for the two of them, especially Clayton and his schemes that were always under the radar (until Logan came around). You could just feel the hatrid festering in Clayton's head, then escalating as the book went forward.

I really liked Ben, Elizabeth's son. He was a sweet kid that preferred other activities (like reading and playing chess) over sports. The way Ben was described, at times, reminded me of my own son. Somehow I imagined Ben looking like an older version of my kid. Elizabeth's grandmother, Nana, was another character I liked. She was stubborn in the fact that nothing would stop her from working at the kennel, even after suffering a stroke. She also had some of the most oddball advice lines, but they made her character unique and very likable.

There is a scene in particular that I enjoyed a lot... when Logan and Elizabeth go on their first date (not really a spoiler alert). Elizabeth decides on the place, which was called Shagging for Crabs. It's a unique restaurant, frequented by locals, where there are only two things on the menu: crab and beer. You dine at picnic tables and eat from buckets of crab (with your hands). While dining, there were certain lines that had to be expressed so the servers knew if you wanted more crab or not. This reminded Logan of being a virgin to The Rocky Horror Picture Show, where your first time is to learn the lines the regulars were shouting (yes, I totally geeked out when I read that part... RHPS love). I have to remember to dine in a place like this if I ever travel to North Carolina.

I've never had problem connecting with the characters from any of Nicholas Sparks novels. For some reason, I couldn't quite get there with Logan. Maybe it was because of his periods of silence, like when he was thinking about Victor or going over Clayton's antics in his head. It kind of bugged me that I couldn't get that connection. I know some of my friends who are in the military (or have spouses serving) enjoy this one because of Logan's story lines while serving as a marine. I like that Nicholas Sparks did another with military connections after writing Dear John. This novel wasn't my favorite, but I still enjoyed it a lot. Rating 3 1/2 out of 5 stars.

BC #30 Picture of Yourself Today and 5 Good Things That Have Happened to You Since You Started This Challenge

Okay, I know it says a pic of myself today, but the pic below was taken at the end of January. I took it with my cell phone and I really liked how it turned out (I have personal issues with a lot of pics of me, just because pics tend to be more unflattering). So there! This is my "today" pic :-)





All right, 5 good things that happened to me since starting the blog challenge....

1. I got my foot in the door toward landing my dream job by becoming a freelance writer/blogger for The Pitch. As of today, I have 4 articles published on Wayward Blog (the music section).

2. I have added a significant amount of movies to my movie collection, through a couple of Blockbuster Videos that are closing/ closed. By significant, I mean at least 40 movies.

3. I went to the Midland theater to see a pre-screening of Kevin Smith's film, Red State. It was followed by a Q&A session, which included an hour long "interview" with two members of the Phelps family (ones that "got out"). Just being there was one of the most amazing experiences of my life.

4. I attended my very first convention, Planet Comicon. As soon as I walked in the door, I felt like I belonged there. My son dressed as Darth Vader, I walked around with good friends I know through Rocky Horror Picture Show, and I got to meet Michael McMillian, a KC native that was on a couple of my favorite shows (True Blood, Big Love). I am already planning to go to another convention Memorial Day weekend :-)

5. Between a settlement check from the Department of Treasury, my state and federal tax refunds, working several days at the daycare, and March Madness (bringing more people to the bar), I've had a financially beneficial month.



This concludes the 30 day blog challenge. I liked how this one allowed me to add pictures and use devices to get these blogs completed. That, and I had been lacking in some personal blogs lately. I'm glad I waited a few months to do this challenge, since it gave me time to give myself a new life to my blog with my weekly themed posts. I hope my readers enjoyed taking another glimpse into my personal life, and will try to incorporate more of it in future blogs.

*Exits stage left*

BC #29- Three Wishes

"Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? I could really use a wish right now, wish right now, wish right now.."



Last August, I spent several hours watching the Perseid meteor shower while lying out on my back deck. I enjoyed seeing over a dozen shooting stars that night. One of them was extremely bright and absolutely gorgeous. While I was counting the ones I saw, I ended up making some wishes. Call me naive, but when I make "silly little wishes" and they become true, I feel like I can have a some faith in it. And yes, a wish I made did come true.

Now, I don't have a shooting star (or three), but I will make some wishes right now.

1. I wish to have consistent motivation to exercise and eat healthier. I have a few things, health-wise, riding against me (through genetics): borderline diabetes, gall bladder stones (leading to removal of the organ), and clogging of arteries. All of these things can be prevented with eating right and exercising. Eating healthier is the lesser of the two problems, since that's not hard for me to do. The motivation to exercise is very inconsistent for me. I will exercise for a few days to a few weeks, then suddenly stop. I want my mind to push through that rut and make it part of my daily/weekly routine. I have plenty of resources at home to get me there (and for free, mind you). I just need that extra push.

2. I wish for my son to not turn out to be like his father, when it comes to responsibility and behavior. My ex had issues with anybody that tried to take authority over him (coworkers and bosses, family, and friends), which led to isolation from all of those people (and loss of several jobs in the time he and I were together). He spent the last year we were married unemployed and sleeping with several women. My ex also had a violent temper. Whenever my son gets mad, the face he makes resembles his father so much that it make my heart stop for a second. If those three things never happen to my kid, I will feel like I don't have to worry about anything he does in life (aside from what random curve balls get thrown at you.. hey, I am a realist after all). I know, as his mother, I am doing something right since I get told many times how well behaved he is and how well he is doing in school and church.

3. I wish gas prices would go down. The last time I filled up my truck (which has a 30 gallon tank), it cost me a little over $96. That amount is sometimes half of my paycheck from the bar (thank goodness for March Madness.. it has picked up business and customers have stayed longer to watch the games). It would be nice to pay a little over a dollar a gallon (which was what I was paying when I was driving my first car in 2001), but I know that's wishful thinking. Reducing the prices down a dollar from where it is now would significantly help. I applaud my friends that travel to/from the Lawrence/Topeka area for work... and I'm afraid to ask what you pay for fuel each week.


Let's see if this wishes come true... I know I'm not the only one who will benefit from the third one :-)

New Music Tuesday: Michael Jackson, Foo Fighters, and More!

Spring has arrived... well by the date and not necessarily by the weather. What does this mean for music? A lot of new albums and singles for our listening pleasure. There are several bands and artists I love that will be releasing new albums in the next couple months. While I anxiously await the release dates, I will be occupied with some of my recent music finds from the past couple weeks.


Michael Jackson "Hollywood Tonight"



Up until now, Michael Jackson's music, post mortal life, have not blown my mind, as the record company promoted. What I really like about this song is that has a little bit of that same sound from his albums from the early 90's. The song is catchy and danceable. The video tells a great story and has some awesome Michael inspired choreography.

Jennifer Hudson "Where You At"



Jennifer Hudson has always had a beautiful voice. I'm happy to hear new music from her. This song is powerful an showcases the voice I fell in love with when watching her on American Idol. Oh, and she looks great even though I didn't mind seeing her chunkier side. :-)

3 Doors Down "When You're Young"



When I first heard this song, I second guessed myself. It sounded just like one of their former songs, "When I'm Gone." Other than that, it's a really good song. It will definitely get radio play. I like how the video is in black and white... it makes the message of the song and the story more effective.


Rise Against "Help is On the Way"



Rise Against is one of my newest discoveries in rock music. I really like how the band used the events of Hurricane Katrina to express a touching video of a family trying to get away from the flooding. They wanted to send a message to their fans and it got my attention. I just found out that Rise Against is coming to Kansas City in the next couple months. I might have to consider going to the show.


Foo Fighters "Rope"



Hello, David Grohl and company... nice to see you guys again! I love how they can take new music and make it sound as familiar as their previous songs, like "Everlong" and "Hero." The last part of the video reminds me of the Goo Goo Dolls video for "Notbroken," with the black silhouette and colored backgrounds.

Black Eyed Peas "Just Can't Get Enough"



Once the Black Eyed Peas did they extremely horrible performance at the Super Bowl, I have lost some respect for them. I didn't think they were the best group; I just liked some of their songs. But, they have always cared for others in need... like how this video is dedicated to those in Japan after all they've suffered because of the earthquakes and tsunamis. This song isn't that bad in the terms that it's not as annoying as some of their songs. I like that it's low key, but don't expect to see me just *NEEDING* this song on my ITunes library.

I hope you guys enjoy the rest of March and wish for the last of the snow forecasts to go away!!!

BC #28- Something That Stresses You Out

I don't mean to brag, but I haven't really had any stress in life for a few years now. I've had moments, but there is nothing in my life that continually stresses me out.

To be fair, a few days ago I had a collaboration of things happen that caused some stress to me....

Saturday, March 26th, 2011

I was woken up around 1:30 in the morning by my son. He had vomited the night before, when I was at work (my boss let me leave a little early so I could get home to take care of him). He needed to go to the bathroom and afterwards came into my room to sleep next to me. He drank some water and went back to sleep. Over the next few hours, he got sick a few more times.

We finally woke up for the day between 10:30 and 11am. I was tired and he was tired. We spent the remainder of the morning and most of the afternoon laying/sitting in my bed while watching tv and movies (and, for me, browsing the internet and doing a little blogging). I had planned for us to go to an event in the Crossroads District (downtown Kansas City) that day, so that was a little bit of a bummer.

He was finally able to hold down food and drink by mid-afternoon (yay!). I had been communicating with my Mom about kiddo's health and she said that her and Dad would be able to make it home for me to go to work (and be a little late). I had arranged for him to go to my aunt's, but that was going to save a trip and keep him at home to continue to feel better.

A little after 5:30 that night (the time that I normally go into work), I called my Mom to see how close she was to home. She was in Archie, MO. Ugh! That's at least 40 minutes away. So I impatiently wait for my parents to get home. When they pulled in just before 6:30, I rushed out the door to get work.

Work called me when I was driving. My boss knew I would be late, but I had forgotten to let the bartenders know I wouldn't be on time. Damn me for my miscommunication!!! As soon as I walk into work, I clock in and apologized to Robyn (bartender/manager of the night). She was grateful to see me and we had a pleasant conversation. I was then informed I was going to train the hostess with being an EXPO (my job aka. food runner).

Coming in an hour late, in the middle of a rush, didn't help with my stress levels. I felt off my game when working and trying to train in that time was adding to my momentary stress. The rush didn't last long, which turned into a slow night. So my coworkers and I bullshit and hope we might get busy again. It never happened. So some of us were already off the clock by 8:30 (including myself). Yep, that's two things that worked against my paycheck (oh well).

I try to make the best out of the rest of my night by enjoying dinner at the bar. I ordered a chicken tender bowl, which was absolutely delicious. Then I noticed there was a pre-season baseball game between the Boston Red Sox and the Minnesota Twins. As a Red Sox fan, I was enjoying the 8-1 lead against the Twins. That is, until the 9th inning. The Twins ended up winning 9-8. I just shook my head in disbelief.

I went home afterwards, got my kiddo to bed and started to get ready for Planet Comicon, which was something my son and I were going to to the next day. I went to bed on a happier, non stressful mood.



Now, I'm not someone to get easily stressed, but this was just one of those days. I recovered from it quickly. Being an eternal optimist does have its benefits :-)

BC #27- Original Photo of the City You Live In

Yeah... I'm bad.

I don't have an original photo of Lee's Summit, MO. You would think I would have SOMETHING after moving here back in 1996. I know this blog was coming and I had time to take a a few pics, but procrastination (then a suddenly busy two weeks) defeated me. So, I went the Google route...



This is a picture of downtown Lee's Summit. The building with the yellow awning on the far left used to be a restaurant called Strother's. It was one of the first places that my family and I made as a hangout spot. It had amazing food (especially the potato skins) and we always ran into people that we knew. Fun fact: Strother was one of the names considered for the town.



This is the train station. I have actually boarded onto an Amtrak at this station (and come home) a couple times. The sitting area with the fountain is a great place to sit (and one of my friends and I took random photos of each other in this area in high school). I love the small town feel to this part of downtown. At Christmastime, downtown Lees Summit makes a big event when lighting the area (much like how the Country Club Plaza does theirs). I always appreciate the beauty of downtown whenever I drive (or walk) through the area.




I found a couple historical pics of Lee's Summit. This mansion is the former home of Todd George, who was one of the former mayors of Lee's Summit. I used to live down the street from this house (located just east of downtown) in another historical home. A former landlord of mine used to own this house, which had been converted into several apartments. Today, it is registered as part of the city's historical society and is home to a local business.



Now, to my part of town... Longview!



Robert Long had built this mansion for his family, along with a barn for show horses, and acres of farm land (for crops and animals). Many wonderful events are held in the mansion, including weddings, murder mysteries, and several events for the neighborhoods surrounding the mansion. The former show barn has been converted into an elementary school, which you can tour to see some of the historical restorations. This, to me, is the most beautiful area of Lee's Summit and I am happy to live in this part of town, especially because I am a lover of history and beautiful architecture.

So I have shared some snippets about the town that in which I am a resident. One day I will decide to take my camera, drive around town, and make an album of the town that I am proud to call my home. :-)

Movie Monday: A Long Distance Relationship, Assisted Deaths, Summer Romance, and International Traveling

First off, I would like to apologize for not having a Movie Monday blog last week. I had worked two jobs the week before and movie watching took a backseat. I'm not complaining though, since I made a good amount of money (in which some of that ended up going toward some movie purchases, hehe) and helped out two of my girlfriends.

Without any further delay, lets check out the movies I watched last week.

Going the Distance



Erin (Drew Barrymore) is a summer intern for a newspaper and Garrett (Justin Long) works for a record company in New York City. They meet at a bar and instantly click. Six weeks later, Erin has to go back to San Francisco. They decide to continue their relationship, despite the distance between them. Over the next year or so, they try to see each other as often as they can (with a surprise visit or two) while researching job transfers to the other side of the country. As their attempts at living in the same town seem to continually fail, they continue to hope that someday they will have a future together.

I am not a fan of long distance relationships.. it just never seems to work out (I am not talking about those separated by military tours). However, I do like the realistic approach this movie takes when it comes to making things work. I loved Erin and Garrett's chemistry, especially when they first met and bonded over video games and useless trivia. The comedic timing of all the actors (including Christina Applegate and Jason Sudekis) were awesome! It wasn't the best chick flick I've seen, but it was very enjoyable. Rating: 3 1/2 out of 5 stars

You Don't Know Jack: The Life and Deaths of Jack Kevorkian



In the 1990's, Dr. Jack Kevorkian (Al Pacino) comes up with an idea to help out people who are terminally ill and have given up on life. He, along with his sister Margo (Brenda Vaccaro), Neal Nicol (John Goodman), and others, provide physician assisted suicides to those seeking out the end to their pain and suffering. That is, until the D.A., the governor of Michigan, and the legislature step in. Dr. Kevorkian finds himself in the middle of a murder trial, in which he argues that his patients wished to end their lives and that he has done nothing wrong.

I haven't really done my research on the controversial practices of Dr. Kevorkian, but I did enjoy watching this movie as I learned. Some of the patients stories made me understand why they made the decision to end their life, since I know that suffering a painful disease is on my list of "things I don't want to experience." When one of his friends asked to assist in her death, my heart tugged a little when I saw how he reacted during the process. This was one of the movies where I didn't notice Al Pacino; all I saw was Dr. Kevorkian... which is a very good thing. Rating: 4 1/2 out of 5 stars


The Last Song



Ronnie (Miley Cyrus), a rebellious teen from New York City, is sent to North Carolina with her brother Jonah (Bobby Coleman) to spend the summer with their father (Greg Kinnear). Ronnie meets Will (Liam Hemsworth) in an unpleasant way and wants nothing to do with him, but he is interested in breaking her rebellious attitude. They bond over rescuing sea turtles and end up starting a summer romance with each other. Despite a few people against the idea of them as a couple they continue to see each other. Then Ronnie's dad ends up in the hospital, revealing a secret that turns her world upside down.

I read the book at the end of 2009 knowing that the movie was already filming. Nicholas Sparks wrote this novel with Miley Cyrus in mind for Ronnie. I thought she did very well. I was disappointed that a few things were omitted from the film (some key plot moments in relation to Blaze and (especially) Marcus, as well as the real reason why Ronnie's parents divorced). I also didn't picture Greg Kinnear as the father, but I grew to like him in the role as I watched the film. I recommend that my friends read this book to get a fuller story. Rating 3 1/2 out of 5 stars


Eat Pray Love



Elizabeth Gilbert (Julia Roberts) has reached a crossroads in her life. After realizing she has never given herself the opportunity to do any self-discovery, she decides to put all of her belongings in storage and go overseas for one year. First she goes to Italy to discover the beauty of absolutely delicious food. In India, she learns the power of prayer and meditation. Finally, in Bali, she find her inner peace.. and love.

Yes, this is a chick flick, but it's different. How? Well, for the majority of the movie, Elizabeth is working on her, not a relationship. It's a breath of fresh air. I loved that she stepped out of her comfort zone and did what she wanted to do. It made the travel lover in me want to do the same thing Elizabeth did (but with a couple different destinations). I need to read the book that this movie was based on, and maybe someday, I will find myself on the other side of the world with a small agenda and endless possibilities! Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

BC #26- Your Dream Wedding

I'm not going to lie. This blog is one of the most difficult I've had to write for this challenge. Why? Well, I haven't really given much thought to my dream wedding. A lot of it has to do with the fact that your wedding day is not meant to be the most important day of your life. If I were to believe that, then I would have nothing else to look forward to in the future.

When my ex-husband and I got married, we spent a total of $46. That was for a marriage license and paperwork to change my last name. That's it. We went to the Independence courthouse on a Saturday morning and were married by a Justice of the Peace. I was wearing a pink long sleeved t-shirt and black pants. We had no family or friends there. Yeah... I'm not doing that again. When I find myself in love and about to get married, I want it special, but low key and inexpensive.

I know I would love to have a fall wedding. Something like late September or October... when the summer heat starts to disappear and the cool, crisp weather takes over. I've always liked the colors of fall, so to have red, orange, yellow, and brown leaves surrounding the wedding and reception would be absolutely gorgeous!



I would like to have an indoor wedding. I would want to step away from a church and have it elsewhere, like Union Station in Kansas City or Longview Mansion. I love the idea of getting married in a place that is rich in history. If the facility can double as a reception, then awesome. Not having to travel across town from wedding to reception would make things easier for everyone. If I had the opportunity to get married on a beach, I wouldn't say no :-)

The dress will be on the simpler side. I do not like a lot of lace or bead work. I want the bottom of the dress to be on the poofier side, much like my junior prom dress (one of the few times in my life where I felt as beautiful as a princess). I am not fond of a pure white dress, so I would have to go with off white or champagne. I like the idea of an accent color, like red, blue or purple. If I can find a dress with minimal accent color, then I might have to get it.

My favorite flowers are roses. I like that there are a variety of colors, but for a wedding I have to go with crimson and white ones. Add baby's breath and other green foliage and I will be happy. Oh, and a ribbon to match the color scheme of the wedding.



At the reception, I want there to be a mix of some of the more common food choices for wedding meals (like salad, fruits, and vegetables) but I also would like to share some favorite foods of my future spouse and myself. For me, I would like to enjoy some fettuchini alfredo or salmon. I would also want chocolate covered strawberries (milk, dark, and white chocolate).

The wedding cake would have to match the floral arrangements and/or wedding colors. Since I like roses, I would want the exterior of the cake to be covered in white icing/fondant and be accented with edible rose pieces (see pic below for example). I want to have a four layer cake. The bottom layer would be chocolate. The second tier would be white. The third tier would be red velvet. The top layer... something special that my future spouse and I would pick (since that is what would be shared on our first year anniversary... yes, I would follow tradition). I would make an attempt to sample each layer of the cake on my wedding day... I have a sweet tooth, after all!




After enjoying food and cake... party time!!! I want to be able to have a great time dancing with friends and family. For those who missed my music video blog challenge, there was a blog about a song to play at my wedding. Well, I picked a song to pay homage to my love for The Rocky Horror Picture Show... The Time Warp. I want to do the pelvic thrust in a wedding dress!!! There are other songs I want to hear, but that one is a must play!

Well, that's pretty much what I wanted to cover about my dream wedding. I am nowhere near making this dream a reality, but thinking about it does get me a little excited. :-)

BC #25- Put Your IPod on Shuffle, List the First 10 Songs

*Grabs IPod.... puts songs on shuffle*



Yes, this is the IPod that I have.... a little older model, but works great!!! It would be nice to have a newer once, since this one can only hold approximately 1,000 songs. Right now, it has a little over 500 songs (When I added all my music to my new laptop, I guess I didn't anticipate that song files would be bigger than a couple years ago. I was kinda disappointed with that). So lets see what songs will randomly pop out when I hit shuffle!!!

Here We Go!!!

1. "London Bridge" Fergie
2. "Teenage Dream" Katy Perry
3. "Crawling" Linkin Park
4. "Language of Love" Cee Lo Green
5. "My First Kiss" 3OH!3 feat. Ke$ha
6. "We Both Reached for the Gun" Richard Gere, Rene Zellweger, Christine Baranski & cast (Chicago Soundtrack)
7. "Hot Mess" Cobra Starship
8. "Lying is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have Without Taking her Clothes Off" Panic! at the Disco
9. "Your Song" Elton John
10. "Give It Away" Red Hot Chili Peppers

Okay.... I like how this pattern is going, so I'm going to do 10 more!!!


11. "Summer Breeze" Seals & Crofts
12. "Dirty Diana" Michael Jackson
13. "OMG" Usher feat. Will.I.Am
14. "I Stand Alone" Godsmack
15. "Just the Way You Are" Bruno Mars
16. "Spiderwebs" No Doubt
17. "Your Love is My Drug" Ke$ha
18. "That's Not My Name" The Ting Tings
19. "No One" Alicia Keys
20. "Block Rockin' Beats" The Chemical Brothers

All right, 10 more. Then I'm done. I promise!!!


21. "Battlefield" Jordin Sparks
22. "Billie Jean" David Cook
23. "Quit Playing Games (With My Heart)" Backstreet Boys
24. "Music" Madonna
25. "Against All Odds (Take a Look at Me Now)" Phil Collins
26. "Maybe" Sick Puppies
27. "Dreams Along the Water" The Leo Project
28. "Let's Go" Trick Daddy feat. Lil Jon
29. "Higher" Creed
30. "I Wanna Love You" Akon feat. Snoop Dogg


Did I ever mention that I LOOOOOOOOVE having my IPod on shuffle??? Even though I put all the songs on it, I still get that giddy surprised feeling when certain songs show up at random. This list of songs doesn't even BEGIN to showcase the variety of music that I listen to, but it's a decent amount of representation! I am a little suprised that three artists (Lady Gaga, RHCP, and David Cook) had two songs on this list. Funny how that happens sometimes, LOL. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed my list of random songs today!

BC #24- Something You've Learned

Three years ago, I was in the middle of getting a divorce. That time was a little difficult for me, even though I made the decision to get out of the abusive marriage. I told myself to not get involved with anyone new until the divorce was finalized. It was actually very easy to do, since I had no interest in dating. I wanted to focus on my own self discovery and to take care of my son.

Having all of that time for self discovery was something I needed to do. If I were to date a guy in that time, it would not have been fair to him because I was not emotionally ready. I heard something from one of my favorite tv shows that to get over someone, it takes about half the time of the duration of the relationship. So that would have been a little over two years for me. Now I know that theory doesn't work on everyone, but to have a good amount of time to focus on you does wonders.

I have seen several friends and coworkers go through the same thing as me. However, most of them started dating new people just weeks after a separation. Of these people, none of them were already involved prior to separation. Seeing that made me realize that I took a different route than the others. It seemed that those individuals were wanting to fill this immediate hole that was created upon separation. I get that... I really do. I just wish that they would have taken my example and focused on themselves.

It wasn't until last summer that I found myself sitting in a car where, after hours of enjoyable conversation, the guy I was with leaned in and took my breathe away with a kiss. That night helped me realize that I was ready to start dating again and, given time, be in a relationship.

So what exactly was it that I learned? It's easy. When you find yourself at the end of a relationship or marriage, you need time to heal and rediscover yourself. I don't take it as a recommendation... it's a MUST DO!!! You will regret it if you don't.