This is an article that was published by the Kansas City Pitch on their Wayward Blog on March 2, 2011
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Pop music is great ... to an extent.
Top 40 may be everyone's favorite mindless genre, but pop music's trends are idiotically transparent. Wayward has spent a few weeks scanning hundreds of radio earworms in order to specifically calculate which words and phrases need to be abolished from pop music's vocabulary.
10. "Play my/her favorite song"
As heard in: Tim McGraw's "Felt Good On My Lips"; Britney Spears' "Hold It Against Me"; Miley Cyrus' "Party in the USA"
Is there anything more obnoxious than name-checking another, better song during a pop song? (No, Miley, there isn't.) But referencing someone else's favorite song is almost as bad.
9. "I like it"
As heard in: Rihanna's "S&M," Enrique Iglesias feat. Pitbull's "I Like It"
Um...we don't like it.
8. "Poppin' bottles"
Heard In: Far East Movement's "Like a G6," T.I. feat. Chris Brown's "Get Back Up," Birdman feat. Lil Wayne's "Pop Bottles"
Poppin' bottles - namely, when large quantities of champagne are either consumed or poured over scantily clad women -- is a remnant of far earlier days, back when Diddy was Puff Daddy and drank Cristal. Currently, it's a standard in hip-hop excess. (Other runner-up phrases that should similarly be abolished: poppin' pills, poppin' caps, or poppin', er, lady parts.)
7. "Duece/Dueces"
As heard in: Chris Brown's "Deuces," Black Eyed Peas' "The Time (Dirty Bit)"
Deuces" has replaced "peace out." Nothing like swapping one obnoxious phrase for another.
6. "Animal" or "cannibal"
As heard in: Usher's "More," Neon Trees' "Animal," Ke$ha's "Cannibal," Disturbed's "The Animal"
Since when did "animal" and "cannibal" go hand-in-hand, outside of novels featuring Hannibal Lecter?
5. "Swagger" or "swag on"
As heard in: Black Eyed Peas' "The Time (Dirty Bit)," Lil Wayne's "6 Foot 7 Foot," Soulja Boy's "Pretty Boy Swag," Jay Z's "Swagger Like Us," Ke$ha's "Tik Tok"
Swagger is defined as a confident and arrogant type of attitude. (It's also a jacket cut.) Once Ke$ha snatched up the term, she made it trashy. Then Toyota decided to shake things up and give swagger a new attitude, with minivans. Jay-Z, meet hordes of balding middle-aged suburbanites.
4. "808's"
As heard in: Far East Movement's "Like a G6," Ke$ha's "Your Love Is My Drug," Kelis' "Bossy," also Kanye West's 808's and Heartbreak
Ah, the 808 drum. It was a staple for music 20 years ago. Now that the children of the '80s are taking over the music industry, it seems as if they all want to pay homage to the instrument. Clearly, the keytar is next.
3. "In the club"
As heard in: Nelly's "Just a Dream," Usher's "DJ Got Us Falling in Love," Black Eyed Peas' "The Time (Dirty Bit)"
When you're awkwardly finding someone to bump-'n-grind with, do you find it slightly redundant to hear references to being "in the club" when you're ... in a club? (Then again, if you were listening to the lyrics anyway, your night might already suck.)
2. "Turn it up" or "Turn it loud"
As heard in: Ke$ha's "We R Who We R," Brad Paisley's "This Is Country Music," Jason Aldeen's "My Kinda Party," Chris Brown's "Yeah 3x," Waka Flocka Flame's "No Hands"
Upon further consideration: I think the music industry has a contract with a company that produces hearing aids.
1. "Put your hands in the air" or "put your hands up"
As heard in: Nelly "Just a Dream," Chris Brown "Yeah 3x," Linkin Park "Waiting for the End," Taio Cruz "Dynamite," Flo-Rida "Club Can't Handle Me"
There is a list of 100 songs that use this phrase -- not including my aforementioned song choices. After all this time, you'd think we'd all have figured out what to do with our hands when dancing at a club, no?
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