Day 5- Something You Hope to Do In Your Life

I have so many things I want to do in my life, so many aspirations! I even have my own bucket list (and have checked off a few things already).

Here's a few things I  hope I get to do or experience in my lifetime:

-Travel all over Europe
-Expand my culinary skills, which includes presentation and decorating
-Have a long, happy marriage
-Learn how to become a bartender
-Own my own house

Now, are you ready for the one thing I hope to do the most???

I want to get back into college. I've already started by filling out the FAFSA a couple months ago. Now I'm working on applying for pell grants (you know, the money you receive that you don't have to pay back).



But that's only part of it.


After I graduate college I wish to find a job that not only will I absolutely love to do, but that it allows me enough freedom to have the kind of lifestyle I want. One where I'm not chained to a desk five days a week. One where I can work from home, or in a coffee shop, or from time to time, work in an office. It's a good thing that my dream job is to be a writer, since it's possible to write anywhere! Technically, I am doing that right now because this blog allows me to write wherever and whenever I want to. The catch is that I'm not getting paid for it. Besides, having a college degree opens me up to related jobs in the field of writing/publications. Who knows what possibilities are out there for me? I don't know all the answers but I'm excited to find out!!!

Day 4- Something You Have to Forgive Someone For

I love my Grandma Savory... some of you have even read about the sacrifices I made to take care of her over the past 2 1/2 years. But there is something that she does that angers me at times, and I need to forgive her for it.

My Grandma has always been about family... nothing wrong with that. Her entire social life revolved around them. So when my Grandpa died in 2006, that really sent a major ripple effect in our family. Our family (immediate and extended) hasn't been the same. We've slowly grown apart and don't spend as much time, which saddens me a little.

Now that she's been in and out of assisted living facilities, she has really been lacking a social life. She doesn't want to interact with the other residents or get involved in any of the many activities that's offered. The only things that she does is watch television, sit in her room, and visit with family. Nothing else. She doesn't even eat in the dining hall. My family and I have been encouraging her to get out and do things, sometimes until we feel we are getting blue in the face.

But I cant blame her either. If I was married to the same person for nearly 60 years and lost him... I can't deny the possibility that I would do the same thing (even though I am a social person in general). So, to my Grandma, please forgive me for getting aggravated at you for not trying to make the most of your current situation. I know that you feel that you are approaching your final days in life, and I just want to see you happier than you have been lately.

Day 3- Something You Have to Forgive Yourself For

I have made some important decisions in my life. Ones that changed the direction of my life altogether. Nearly 3 years ago, I made what I considered the best decision I could for myself and for my son. After fighting and attempting to work through what seemed like fixable issues, I separated from the man I married and went through a divorce.



I do not regret making this decision at all, but during the divorce process I had this nagging feeling of guilt. I felt guilty about getting a divorce because I was raised in a family where divorce was pretty much nonexistent. For some reason, my immediate and extended families have all found "the one" and have stayed married for decades: my parents, aunts/uncles, cousins, and grandparents. So for me to not fall into that line of happy marriages makes me feel like the black sheep of the family.



I really shouldn't feel that way, especially since my family was completely supportive of my decision. I love that my family cares that much about my well being (and Truman's). I don't know what I would do without them. But I do need to forgive myself for feeling guilty. There was nothing wrong with making that decision and I have yet to find anyone that disagrees with me.

Stupid Silly Bandz

I've tried to avoid it as much as I can... but I couldn't stop it from showing up in my house last week, in a bag of Halloween goodies.



See the one that's shaped like a ghost??? It's sitting in my room at the moment. I need to get it out of there. I need to forget that it exists, because if I don't... more will show up.

No, it's not a cookie cutter or an eraser.... the object is part of a trending toy/accessory called Silly Bandz.



Silly Bandz are silicone produced and are worn like bracelets. They come in hundreds of colors, styles, and shapes. When worn as a bracelet, then removed, the silly band goes back to its original shape. The shapes can be anything from animals to food, to cartoon characters and holiday themed bandz.

I first noticed them at Walmart this summer. I was shopping with my Mom and my son. My Mom saw them and exclaimed that all the kids that went to trampoline camp were wearing them and trading each other for different ones. She mentioned that the guy who invented them was already a millionaire. I grabbed a package and just stared. A guy took a simple, everyday product and reinvented it to appeal to kids. Why can't I think of stuff like this???

So the trend has exploded this summer. All the grade school kids are wearing them, trading them, and begging their parents for more. About a month into the school year, I received an e-mail from my son's principal about Silly Bandz. Apparently kids like to fling these at one another, much like my generation did with rubber bands. So the rule at my kid's school is that Silly Bandz are off limits... SWEET!!!! Now my kid won't come home and ask if he could have them because the other kids do. I was a happy parent that day.

With the exception of the Halloween ghost silly band in my kid's bag, I have completely avoided the trend altogether. However, we are approaching the busiest shopping holiday of the year, and I have a feeling that a certain parent of mine *cough* MOM *cough* might just stuff some of these little things into my kid's stocking... especially since I noticed Transformers and Star Wars Silly Bandz this week at Target. I might have to "accidentally" lose them...

But... one thing that does peak my curiosity of Silly Bandz. I wonder if any adult-themed ones may make it to the adult stores. Then, I might have to reconsider my thoughts on them, because if my kiddo catches me wearing, say, one that's the shape of a pair of lips or a martini glass, then I would have to give in.

That was just an example... I'm still not going to give in. Dammit!

Day 2- Something You Love About Yourself

Ever since I was little, I have loved learning about new things. It could be anything I learned in school or something I discovered from television or a book. What I love more about me is my willingness to learn about new things. If I am really wanting to learn about something, you can just tell from the look on my face that I am truly interested.



When in grade school, learning about new things was easy to do, especially in elementary school. The teachers decided what to teach and, at that age, I was just in awe of everything I was learning. Nothing bored me. Once I got into 5th grade, I was put in the gifted program. That brought on a new aspect of learning. We had to do these projects that were based on a singular topic. We had freedom to choose from a variety of topics. I really liked that and it helped me learn about things that I may not have learned in a normal classroom setting.

Once I entered junior high and high school, I was able to have some freedom in choosing courses I wanted to take. I wanted variety so by the time I graduated high school, I had taken theater, home economics, current events, Spanish, a lot of different art classes, and journalism. I thought I left my grade school days extremely fulfilled and ready to broaden my horizons even more when going to college.



Yea, that didn't work out as well as I had hoped. My learning took a backseat to other things. I almost flunked out of my first semester in college. Part of it was because I was so excited to be on my own, away from my family. The other reason is that at the time I was living in St. Louis... so many things tempted me away from studying. I needed to go into college with the mindset that I loved to learn and that I was paying to get that kind of education. Nothing shows a bigger waste of time and money than failing courses.

In recent years, I have used Google and Wikipedia a lot to help educate myself on things. When I saw a group on Facebook called "Save MO Strip Clubs," I had to research what that was all about. What I didn't expect was to be actively following Senate Bill 586 for several months, but I am glad I did. I did the same thing when I wrote my "Earthquake Insurance" blog. It's good to educate yourself on things like this, not only to be prepared for what happens around you, but to also be able to contribute your own thoughts and beliefs when discussing such topics.



I also have used my learning skills with significant others. When I am with a guy and they are interested in something that I am not familiar with, I don't just automatically dismiss it as something I wont ever like. I ask them a lot of questions about the activity or hobby. I also get online and look up things. For example, I dated a guy years ago that listened to a lot of Insane Clown Posse and he called himself a juggalo. Since I knew nothing about it, I asked a lot of questions. He had me listen to some of ICP's music. I admit, there are a couple of their songs that are decent, but other than that I have no real interest in ICP or the juggalo world. But at least I tried to understand what he liked. Even when my ex-husband Brian was getting into motorcycles and doing stunts, I tried to see what he saw in them. That one just didn't work out because he refused to get me involved in that part of his life. Oh well.

I don't think I will ever stop learning about things. There's just so much out there that I don't know about and I want to experience as much of it as I can. When I get old and reflect on what I did with my life, I want to be able to say I did myself proud. So far so good!!!

Day 1- Something You Hate About Yourself

Before I go into this blog, I need to say something. Hate is a very strong word and I do not normally use it. So for me to really hate something about myself is not really that possible, but there are several things that I express with great animosity.



There are a few things that I dislike about myself. Since I was born a Scorpio, I am, by nature, a jealous and stubborn person. I can deal with that since I am not known for either of those things, and when I get that way, it's pretty mild. I have blogged before about my weight/body issues, so why do another one like that? Maybe about the fact that I get road rage over stupid drivers??? I could, but sometimes I enjoy that, hehe.

There is something that really stands out that I dislike though, and it's pretty disturbing...

Let's say that I'm driving down the highway. I'll have the music on as I'm making my way toward whatever destination I am headed toward. Then, I will imagine that the two cars in front of me violently crash into each other, causing chaos on the highway. I make a very rash decision and swerve like crazy to avoid being part of the pileup.



I imagine scenarios like this a lot.

Actually, that one is pretty mild. I've imagined getting a phone call that my ex-husband died in a fire. I've also pictured, when going down windy roads, a huge buck run in front of my Jeep and I have no time to avoid the impact. Or where my parents are killed and I inherit their house, which I turn around and move into their bedroom and redecorate every room to my personal tastes. A few nights ago, driving home from seeing Saw 3D, I imagined someone hiding in the back of my Jeep, waiting for the right opportunity to kidnap me (yes, in a cloak and a boar's head mask).




I'm not exactly proud that my mind thinks these things, but it makes me wonder if that's part of being human... vividly imagining worst case scenarios happening to you and/or your loved ones. I wonder if anyone else imagines things like this too, or am I really just a dark and twisted person? Do others get into graphic detail about these scenarios? I hope I'm not alone in this...

30 Days of Truth-- A Blogger's Challenge

I read on someones blog earlier this month of a challenge that many bloggers have been doing. It's called 30 Days of Truth. The challenge helps reveal truths about yourself, and to me it seems like a good thing to help out with self discovery and character building. As I read the topics for each day (for 30 days), I felt that I should take up the challenge as well. So, for the month of November, I will be blogging my own 30 Days of Truth. The blogs will be posted at Noon each day... just to let you guys know.

Here is the list of topics for the challenge:

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.

Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.

Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.

Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.

Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.

Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.

Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.

Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.

Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.

Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.

Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.

Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.

Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)

Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)

Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.

Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.

Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.

Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.

Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?

Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.

Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?

Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.

Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.

Day 24 → Make a play list to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)

Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.

Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?

Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?

Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?

Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.

Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

The Rocky Horror Glee Show, A Review

I remember reading an issue of Entertainment Weekly this summer which announced that Glee was going to pay tribute to The Rocky Horror Picture Show. I had mixed feelings about it. A part of me was excited because I had seen the Lady Gaga Glee episode and thought it did a pretty good job. The other part of me was afraid it was not going to do the cult film justice. Since I was at work last night, I didn't get to see it. But I did read some reviews from other Rocky fanatics and some entertainment blogs. Then, right before I started watching the episode, my Dad was telling me about it. Whoa.... my Dad watched Glee.



Anyway... let's get down to business, shall we???

The episode starts off with lips ("Science Fiction/Double Feature")... well, they are definitely off to a decent start. Wait a second... they altered lyrics and the song was shortened by less than half. I am already laughing... that's a bad sign for the rest of the episode. Then, it jumps to the students performing "Over at the Frankenstein Place" onstage. I'm liking how the set looks, but not so much the fact that the entire cast was onstage (hiding behind set pieces). I also instinctively raise my hand in the air when the line "there's a light" is performed... I guess going to the live shows have corrupted me, lol.

We now enter the actual Glee stuff. Mr. Schuester finds out that Emma went to a midnight showing of The Rocky Horror Picture Show with her boyfriend. This makes him jealous and yet, inspires him to get the Glee Club to perform the musical. You do not decide to do Rocky Horror out of spite... shame on you Mr. Schuester!!! So when he presents it to his students, there are a lot of mixed feelings. Some of them love it, some of them have no idea what it's about, and some argue that it's not appropriate for a high school production. This reminded me of when I daydreamed about my high school doing Rocky Horror (and that I wished for it do the film justice... like only have seniors who were 18 perform it, obviously because of the sexuality). Okay moving on...

Enter Meatloaf and Barry Bostwick (Asshole! yes, I did shout that at the screen). They were some sort of tv producers for the local news station (I think... I was too wrapped up in the amazement that they were actually on Glee) and talking to Sue about the Glee Club's Rocky production. Ah... why couldn't they have been on the show more? I might have liked it better.

Then Finn and Rachel practice "Dammit Janet." Hmm... they actually got the choreography pretty damned accurate. I was pretty proud of that. I think Rachel's voice is too whiny for Janet, though. The next scene is when Emma's boyfriend Carl (John Stamos) auditions for the high school play by singing "Hot Patootie/ Bless My Soul." I've heard John Stamos sing before, and he's pretty good. I think he did a decent job on the show, however I am a HUGE Meatloaf fan. Nobody can upstage him... I refuse to allow it. So when Mr. Schuester asks Carl to perform a Frankenfurter song, Carl flips out. He says that it's inappropriate for a high school production and that wearing the right garments is not right outside the bedroom. Fucking hypocrite... he's the one that takes Emma to the show and is now trying to justify that it's wrong. *shakes head*

Time for "Sweet Transvestite." This was the WORST number on the episode. It was extremely short and the choreography wasn't even close to being accurate. Since Mercedes decided to be Dr. Frankenfurter, some of the lyrics were altered: "I'm not much of a man" turned into "I'm not much of a girl." Wow... that really pissed me off. Who cares if a girl is playing the role? You don't change those lyrics (most of the floor show productions have females playing Dr. Frankenfurter, but you don't see them saying "girl" just because they are female). Now, when they changed "transsexual" to "sensational," I was fine with that... for the simple fact that Glee is on public television and the FCC would have been throwing out some fines if that wasn't changed.

Three of the students are dressed as Columbia. None of the costumes are even close to the authenticity of the film. Shame, shame, shame.

Emma offers to help Mr. Schuester work on his role as Rocky (since the student felt uncomfortable in his teeny gold shorts... of course you would get the self-conscious teen in this production). They perform "Touch-A, Touch-A, Touch Me" in an empty classroom. Basically Mr. Schuester loses his shirt. That's it. Lame. Oh, and I noticed that "heavy petting" was changed to "heavy sweating"... another FCC friendly move, I assume.

When practicing the show again, Sue shouts out "This play is terrible!" I agreed. Then came the "Janet! Brad! Dr. Scott! Rocky!" montage. Again, I caught myself doing floor show shout outs... "Rocky! Bullwinkle!"

Mr. Schuester finally confesses to the Glee Club that he went into the Rocky Horror show for all the wrong reasons. He explains that the movie was popular for people who were outcasts who felt they needed a sense of belonging with others around them, much like the Glee club. Going back to my Rocky Horror blog, I mentioned that I never really noticed that the musical was cult or outcast friendly until I was in high school. All I saw was a fun, sexual musical. *Shrugs* So Mr. Schuester pulls the plug on the play, but says that they will still perform the music.

The show ends with the entire cast performing the "Time Warp."



Yea.... I think the phrase cluster fuck is the right word for this. For one, they perform this on the set of the Lab.. wrong. There are two Magentas and two Columbias.... where are the Unconventional Conventionalists or the Criminologist (with no fucking neck)??? A damn shame, if you ask me. And what is going on with the boxy look of Magenta's skirt... that bugged me like crazy. Although, for a collaboration effort of a high school tribute... that's basically what it was, toned down for age appropriate-ness and it represented many elements of the film.

I think I speak for all Rocky Horror enthusiasts out there.... if we had the control, we would have done it so much better. It's a good thing I'm going to a Fishnets and Floorshows Rocky Horror production this weekend... it will help me shake off my frustrations with this Glee episode.

Shame on Me for Calling Myself A Movie Geek to Not Yet Watch these Films!!

Last night, I was watching John Carpenter's Halloween. I was also talking to my best friend Brandon on facebook, and mention that this was my first time watching the movie, even though I've seen several of the other Halloween films. He flips out on me and then decides to tell some of our mutual friends in a chat room. Again, more shocked reactions. In my defense, there are a lot of films out there. I know I won't see them all, but I enjoy trying!

So when I woke up this morning, I spent a lot of time thinking about how my movie geekness could be in jeopardy because there are several excellent films out there that I have yet to see. I expect that many will react to this list with amazement, denial, and shock.... "Wow... Casey hasn't seen THAT movie???" "Wow, that's a classic, she needs to see that one immediately!" "How could she have not seen that one.... that's totally her kind of movie!"

Are you guys ready for this??? Don't say I didn't warn you....


-The Godfather Trilogy (I personally feel extremely ashamed of not seeing these movies)
-Rain Man (I own it)
-Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
-any of the Rocky films
-The Shining
-Alien
-2001: A Space Odyssey
-The Graduate
-Philadelphia
-Empire of the Son
-Terminator (although I've seen #2 and #3)
-This is Spinal Tap
-Lawrence of Arabia
-Rent
-Slumdog Millionaire
-Taxi Driver
-Across the Universe (my Mom owns it... good thing I live in the same house, lol)
-The Goonies (major shame since I'm an 80's kid and all)
-Fried Green Tomatoes
-Vertigo
-Dog Day Afternoon
-Gone with the Wind
-The Phantom of the Opera (I own the Gerald Butler version)
-It's a Wonderful Life
-Monty Python and the Holy Grail
-A Clockwork Orange
-Jaws
-American History X (I own it)

Okay, everyone.... please get those shocked looks off your faces!!! It's a good thing I have access to some of these in my own house. As for the others... I'm working on it! I will no longer feel I need to shame myself for missing out. But all I have is time in the future.... and a couch, some movie snacks, and hopefully a few friends to join me in my movie watching endeavors!

Oh, and yes.... I enjoyed John Carpenter's Halloween... by far the best one!!! The theme still makes my heart beat faster.

Shopping Routes

Have you ever walked around one of your favorite stores and realized that every time you wander the aisles, you have established your own shopping route? I know I have. When noticing this, I found myself mentally tracing my steps in several stores. It's true... I have sub-consciously created a route for all my favorite places. I would like to share an example of my normal route in a store I frequent very often:



-From my house, it only takes me about 5 minutes to get to Target. The store is located in a shopping center with several retail stores and restaurants, including Borders, Lowe's, Best Buy, Old Navy, and Bath and Body Works. It's actually a Super Target, which means there is a retail side and a grocery side. I usually park on the retail side, which is to the East.

-Once I enter the store, I go to the "deals" section straight ahead. You know, the section with hundreds of items that range from $1 to $2.50. I have invested quite a bit of money in this section; I have purchased framed pictures, toys, books, office supplies, socks, stocking stuffers, gift wrap, batteries, and many other things from this part of the store. You never know what you are going to find, and that's part of the excitement!

-Then, I go to the fun section: Movies, Music, and Books. This should not be a surprise to anyone that I make this one of my first destinations, especially since I spend the most time browsing movies. I'll look at the new releases and look for the movies on sale each week. I'll look at the $5 movie section and see if any new films have been moved there. Last week, I made a new discovery... a $2 movie section. Yes, these are basically "D" List movies, but sometimes you can find a decent one. They had a lot of horror movies during my last visit. I'll glance at some of the cds, looking for any recent releases that may be on sale for $8. Then I head over to the books. I'll look for my usual authors and see if they have any new works or if they have a paperback version.

-Time to search for clearance end caps!!! There are four areas in the store that normally has these, and two of them are right by the entertainment/seasonal section of the store. When I'm done scavenging the end caps, I head to the seasonal section. Right now, it's all about Halloween, but a few aisles already have Christmas items ready to sell. Personally, I don't even want to look at or think about Christmas until after my birthday, but in the world of retail... I have no choice but to see it. Oh well, moving on.

-If Truman is shopping with me, this would be the time that we head over to toys, followed by his clothing section.

-Next, I browse the shoe section. I make myself do this since I don't have the love for shoes like most women.

-I walk along the bath and bedding area of Target next, and end up in the furniture section. Usually I just dream of the things I would like to have in my own place. Then I head to the storage/kitchenware/home decor section, where they have several clearance end caps. I like these end caps because I have found gum, shampoo, perfume, over the counter meds, pull ups (when Truman was still using them), and deodorant.

-Ah, clothing! There is something about the clothing selection at Target that appeals to me a lot. Some of that has to do with the clearance clothing (have you noticed a pattern... I love clearance). I have found, and purchased, a lot of dressy and cute tops here. Most of them have cost me less than five dollars. It's one of those things where when you first realize how much you are saving, and you keep coming back for more.

-My sweet tooth usually kicks in about now, so I head to the candy section. If I end up purchasing something here, most likely it will be gum.

-If I need groceries, this is the time where I shop for them. Usually I don't get groceries at Target but I like to shake things up sometimes.

-Last stop before going to the checkout counter or leaving the store: socks, hosiery, purses and belts. I have recently purchased a few purses here.... especially since they cost me less than 10 bucks. And they were cute!!!

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how I shop at Target!