Monday, September 27, 2010

Tanning is Awkward

Celsius Tannery is my go-to place right now. My sister is getting married in less than 2 weeks and I need to get rid of my farmers tan. I'm not a "fake baker" but I am more than happy to do this to look good in my strapless dress.

However, the awkwardness crept up pretty quick.

The first time I went (last Friday), I went in for six minutes. It was just a normal tanning bed... florescent bulbs above and underneath you. As many of you know, I am not skinny. So the part of the bed that you lay on sometimes settles under my weight. Every time I heard the bed shift under me, I had a mini heart attack. It wasn't just about my weight. It was also about a stupid movie.... Final Desination 3. For those who havent seen the movie, there is a scene where two of the girls meet their doom inside a tanning bed. The room gets way too hot (the girl's fault) and the glass breaks, causing them severe burning and their eventual death. So this mini heart attack is a reminder of that very scene. What would have made me jump out of the bed and run is if the song "Love Rollercoaster" played on the radio.

Other than that, it was a normal tanning experience.

Then, tonight happens....

Mom tells me to go use the high pressure bed so I can get my tan done faster and get instant results. And this tanning bed has you sit on a mattress. Ah... sounds like something I'm going to really like. I get in my room and instantly love it. I get all cozied on the mattress and get ready to lower the top of the bed. Hmm... it doesnt move. Maybe it will lower as soon as the timer starts.


So I say screw it and do my 15 minutes on my back, then my 15 on my stomach. Holy crap! That tanning bed is extremely hot! It made me think of the part in Breaking Dawn (yes I made a Twilight reference, back off!) where Bella is going through her transformation... the fire hot pain she had to endure. Yep, I can totally relate now.

While I was laying on my stomach, I got extremely relaxed... enough to nod off at least 3 or 4 times (pretty impressive in a 15 minute time span). So when my session was over, I got off the mattress and looked at the mirror to see how much I tanned.


My front and back are tanned, but not my sides.

Oh... what's that on the inside of the tanning bed??? Up and down buttons. I try them. Oops... that's what I was supposed to do to lower the bed closer to me. Guess I'll be going back tomorrow to fix my error.

Wow.... do I feel stupid.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Exercise? Yes Please! Motivation? Where the Hell Are You?

I love the fact that I'm not a skinny, beanpole girl. I'm proud to have curves. But, I also dont like that there are areas of my body that I just cringe at when looking in the mirror (my upper arms, my stomach, and my upper thighs). I want to do something about it, moreso in the past two years. The problem is, I have no motivation to exercise on a regular basis and it pisses me off at times. Now that I think about it, being pissed off and not actively trying to change that is passive agressive behavior (something I unfortunately have been doing a lot lately... grrr).

I have yet to lose the weight I gained when I was pregnant with Truman six years ago (33 pounds, in case you were curious). Part of that has to do with the fact that food was a comfort to me when I was in my marriage to Brian. No, I wasn't binge eating (based on what my friend Tiffany wrote on her blog, I have never done that in my life), but I was eating all the wrong foods (sweets, lots of soda, fried foods, and a lot of fast food). It is very easy to fall into that kind of eating habits, especially when you are on the go and just want something that's quick to make and eat.

2008 was a very crazy year for my family. My dad had his unexpected bypass surgery that May, as well as finding out that he is diabetic. Both of those things can be affected by weight. I noted that I could be a borderline diabetic and must start taking action... and didn't. Then, in October, my Mom had her gall bladder removed. Another thing affected by diet, but also can be hereditary (my aunt had hers removed and my grandma may have to get rid of her's soon). I remember looking at my cousin Katy and saying "We could be next" in a half-joking, half-serious manner. Again, I didn't do anything about taking care of myself.

That Christmas brought the Nintendo Wii. Sweet! A video game system that makes you physically active at the same time! Yep! I am sure to easily lose some weight doing this. Um... no. I dont break a sweat bowling, or playing Guitar Hero. Fail.

I'm not going to talk about 2009 at all, except that when my sister got engaged, that made me think that I have plenty of time to lose weight and look good for the wedding.

New Year's 2010... I made a resolution to get more agressive with exercising and be more aware of the food I was eating. So in January, I got out Billy Bank's Tae Bo workout videotape (yes, you heard me correct, VHS not DVD) and starting doing it everyday. That lasted about a week and a half. In April, Mom send me to Target to get Just Dance for the Wii. For those who aren't familiar with it, Just Dance is a game where you learn the dance moves to a variety of songs. I really enjoy playing this. By the time I'm on the 3rd song, I'm breaking into a sweat. By the 5th or 6th song, I am done. That's about a 20-25 minute workout. The problem is, I don't do it regularly.

Back in late-July, I decided to do something that I never imagined I would resort to... Hydroxycut. I took them twice a day, as said on the bottle. I converted to drinking mostly water, with the random glass of milk or juice. I combined that with doing Just Dance workouts. I felt them working. It was curbing my appetite, I wasn't eating nearly as much as I normally did, and I had energy.

Three weeks later, I stopped taking the pills. I thought I could try without and see if I can keep up with the routine. Slowly, I was back where I started.

Last week, I weighed myself for the first time in years (228.8 pounds). I realized that I am at the heaviest I have been in my life. Two days ago, I did it again and realized I lost almost 3 pounds (225.6)... without exercising and without watching what I have been eating. You want to know my secret??? My job requires me to do a lot of walking. I get paid to give customers their food AND get an unexpected workout 4-5 days a week! I just have to watch out for snacking on fries and tortilla chips while waiting for orders to be ready.

Now, I mentioned my sister's engagement. Her wedding is in 13 days and my goal was to lose 60 pounds over the past year. I wanted to go into the bridal shop and be able to get my bridesmaid's dress taken in a lot due to my impressive exercise regime. That plan shot to shit, but the few things I have attempted to do this year is more than I have ever done at any given time. So on that note, I am proud of myself for making those attempts, even if they were short lived.

Based on my height, experts say that 135-140 is an ideal weight. I don't want to be ideal so I set my goal to be about 150-155 lbs. As long as I get to keep my curves I will be happy.

Walks to parents bathroom and weighs myself

226.8 pounds


Oh well, it's a new week... I'll make it go down!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Sesame Street Antics

In the past 24 hours, I have watched quite a bit of Sesame Street. No, it's not because I secretly miss my son at home and watching his shows fills the lonely void. I'm a sucker for pop culture references... always have been. That's probably why I love South Park and the Powerpuff Girls so much. Sesame Street does not disappoint with their plethora of pop culture-ness. Even when I was little, I got excited seeing movie stars and musicians with Big Bird and Cookie Monster.

I have noticed, compared to the days that I was little, that there has been an increase of using celebrities and public figures in segments and songs on Sesame Street. It kind of makes me sad that the more memorable songs have been accompanied with someone like the Goo Goo Dolls or Chris Brown. With the new season of Sesame Street starting up soon, the company has released some teasers as to who to expect to see with Elmo, Cookie Monster, and the rest of the gang. Plus, a certain celebrity that we thought we would see:

Some of you have noticed, either yesterday or this morning, the controversy of this Katy Perry clip. It will never be aired on Sesame Street. Why? Her supposed lack of clothing, revealing cleavage. I have read many comments on Yahoo and news websites about how this was completely inappropriate. I have also read from friends on Facebook and Twitter that a lot of people are making too big a deal about this.

To me, I don't see anything wrong with the clip. I wouldn't mind my kid watching this video. For one, he is/was a huge fan of Elmo. He also loves Katy Perry's music (maybe more than me, lol). This video would make his day.

There is another clip I came across yesterday that I don't see as much of a shock factor as Katy Perry's clip:

Wow... Sesame Street did a True Blood parody. Dont get me wrong, I love this. I thought they did a great job. But for people to attack Katy Perry's clip over cleavage and not make a big deal that they parodied a show that has a lot of violence baffles me. Where are the people who are angry that this clip made it on the show? Oh, right. This provided more entertainment value. Violence is more damaging to a kid than sex. I would much rather have my kid witness an act of love instead of an act of hate.


There's my rant for the day. Now I'm just going to sit back and enjoy the simpler days of Sesame Street.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

25 Random Facts about Myself

1. As a kid, I had a fear of clowns. Not the kind that were at birthday parties (those I could handle). The scary ones. It started with an episode of "Are You Afraid of the Dark?" To this day, I have no real desire to watch Stephen King's It.

2. After failing my driver's test twice in Lee's Summit, I went to Raytown and passed.

3. I could have easily taken all the advanced placement courses in junior high and high school and had a 4.0 GPA but chose not to. Why? I wanted to have a social life, a job, and date. No, I do not regret doing this.

4. I have a major sweet tooth, always have. Especially if chocolate is involved.

5. Out of everything I obtained from Kindergarten through Senior year, I have saved my artwork and my writings. That's what was important to me.

6. If I am in a park and see an unused swingset, I jump at the opportunity and swing.

7. I make sure that I always have gum. When I see gum on clearance, I stockpile, hehe

8. My dad competed in swimming and diving in high school and college, and is a swimming and diving coach. I don't know how to swim... just a little ironic, don't you think?

9. My greatest fear is to be diagnosed with dementia or Alzheimer's. I thrive on my photographic memory so much that I cannot bear to imagine not having the ability to use it.

10. One of my favorite things to do is go to Borders or Barnes and Noble and spend hours just walking around looking at books.

11. When the day comes that I am about to become a homeowner, I would rather have an older house opposed to a new construction one. Why? Houses nowadays have less character and I want to be able to pick out and work on the home improvements.

12. I have posed a few times for art projects. One time I posed in the nude.

13. I have always wanted to have a social group much like on the tv show Friends. One where you all live near each other and have a "spot" that you frequent many times a week.

14. I am proud to be left handed.

15. I feel sexiest when wearing red undergarments. When I have days where I don't feel so good about myself, I will put some on to give myself a boost.

16. I want to witness an EF-4 or EF-5 tornado someday... from a distance, of course. Watching video on YouTube doesn't count.

17. Whenever there is a new dance craze, I'm usually one of the first people to learn it.

18. In the past year or two, I have become a major recycling nut. I get annoyed sometimes when I find things in the trash can that should actually go in the recycle bin.

19. I have a bag of fabric remnants in my room. I plan to make a quilt someday.

20. When I was younger, I loved going up to Jamesport, MO with my grandparents. My Grandpa Savory would participate in the craft show and my Grandma would take my sister and I around the shops to look around. I was fascinated at how the Amish lived without technology.

21. With the exception of 4 months in Fort Scott, Kansas... I have lived in Missouri my entire life.

22. When home alone, I love blasting music really loud and dancing. Sometimes this involves standing on my bed. Other times I actually change clothes while pretending that I am performing in front of people.

23. I think about sex a hell of a lot more than many women I know.

24. I had a slighty traumatizing incident with a cat when I was 11. I was bitten, then I passed out and had to go to the doctor to get a tetanus shot. I really haven't like cats since.

25. My favorite painting is "Starry Night" by Vincent VanGogh.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Epic Failures and Embarrassing Moments. Wait... Aren't Those the Same Thing??

-One particular day in the eighth grade, my friends and I were enjoying lunch as usual. My friend Shannon starts laughing at something, which caused her to wave her arms up. As she does this, she hits her can of Sunny D in the process. It spills out and some of the liquid lands on my white South Park t-shirt... right at crotch level. I never realized that the color consistancy of Sunny D is very similar to urine. Fortunately, tying a plaid shirt around your waist was still a popular trend at this time, and my friend Kathryn was willing to save me from further embarrassment outside the lunchroom.

-I was kind of a tomboy in my elementary school days... climbing trees, jumping fences, and practicing wheelies on my bike. So there was one time, when I was about 12, where my friends and I were jumping over a fence. I was pretty confident climbing up the 4 foot chain link fence and sat on top of it to jump down. As I start my jump, I realize my pants are stuck to the fence. It was too late. My pants ripped on BOTH back thighs and left some pretty big holes. To this day, I have avoided sitting on a fence, maybe even jumping them too.

-When I was 19, I spent a lot of time hanging out with my friend Robin. One day, we were leaving our friend Maria's house in her car. We were near the bowling alley when I noticed a massive puddle of water that had formed from a wave of recent rainshowers. I realize Robin is getting dangerously close to it and start freaking out. I shout "PUDDLE!" kinda loudly. She drives through it anyway and, to my realization, knew it wasn't deep at all. Epic fail. Ever since then, every time we see each other and there is a puddle around, she makes sure to point it out to me (or randomly brings it up on my Facebook).

-In May of this year, I was on my way home from the I-70 Drive In with Truman. I was going through Raytown when I notice a police car pass me, turn around, and then pull me over. Apparently I had my parking lights on, but not my headlights. Ok, no big deal. So I retrieve my license and insurance information for the officer. As I am doing this, Truman starts talking to him. I glance back at Truman through the rearview mirror. To my horror, he is holding his extra pair of Transformers underwear and showing them to the officer. I couldn't look at the officer for the rest of the very short time left with him.

-This one is very cliche, but it does happen. Case in point... I was about 10 or 11 and a lot of my extended family from St. Louis was in town to celebrate Christmas at my grandparents. I don't remember if it was from my Mom or Grandma, but to have to show everyone the 3-4 pairs of underwear, especially in front of my cousins Scott and Jason (who were teens at the time), was not something I expected to do that year.

-I had worked at Pizza Hut in the short time that I was living in Fort Scott, Kansas. There was a family of four that ordered two pizzas. As I was walking to their table, one of the pizzas started to slide off pan. When I was less than 10 feet from their table, the pizza lost the battle with the pan. It crashed to the ground. I hastily get the other pizza to them while apologizing like crazy for them having to wait while the kitchen started making a new, floorless pizza.

-I was at a party with the Home Depot crew back in 2007. There was an awesome turnout and a few drinking games were in action. I decided to try my skills playing Jerry's Kids. [Basic rules: you have 3 shots to drink while someone rolls a pair of dice. If they roll doubles before you finsih the shots, you have to refill the shots and drink again... a total of six shots] We were using Bud Light that night. As I assumed, I lost and had to refill. Being new to drinking games was not helping me, plus the fact that the beer was foamy. I was trying to drink them way too fast, and immediately regurgitated the liquid. My skills have greatly improved since then, thanks to many beer pong games.

-I attended the annual carnival at my junior high with a few of my friends. When it was over, we were all standing outside waiting for our parents to pick us up. For some reason, I was feeling a little hyper. I jumped around a little and ended up bodyslamming my friend Eric. Neither of us crashed to the ground, but we made sure to keep a safe distance from each other.

-From the age of 14 to about 17, I was overly confident when walking outside in winter. I cannot tell you how many times I have slipped on ice and landed on my butt. Many of those times were in front of my house. Those two steps from the front door to the sidewalk were missed many times. And no, I have never broken anything in the process.

-I was 19 and having a low key Saturday afternoon. I didn't have to work so I thought I would watch a few of the free rentals I got as a benefit to being a Blockbuster employee. I made raman noodles and was carrying them out to the living room. The bowl was hotter than I expected. I naturally let go and it landed on my right foot. Searing hot noodles and boiling water. Major ouch. I ran to the bathroom and stuck my foot in the sink while blasting cold water. The evidence of my foot burn lasted a couple weeks, but at least I didn't cause any permanent damage. *smacks forehead

-For 2001 New Years, I joined my sister and her youth group for a night of fun: Sports City in Blue Springs, bowling, roller skating, and a movie in one of the churches in Lee's Summit. When we went to Landmark to go skating, and I was pumped! I hadn't gone roller skating for years at that point and was ready to have some fun. I was trying to stop the skates while turning at the same time. It doesn't work. I landed on my tailbone. I stopped skating for the night. About three weeks later, sitting in one of my classes, I finally notice that my tailbone stopped hurting.

Note to self: Overconfidence causes pain and embarrassment... must remember that to prevent more moments like these!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

A Random Act of Kindness

May 21, 2007

Brian, Truman, and I were living in a house in Greenwood at the time. I was happily working at Home Depot. On this particular evening, Truman and I went up to Price Chopper to get groceries for the house (I'm more of a HyVee person, but that was the closest grocery store to the house). So I take my time and look around until I get everything I thought we needed.

When I go to pay for the groceries, my debit card is declined. Odd... I just got paid 3 days ago. There's plenty of money in my account. So I try again with a smaller total... still declined. A group of 3 people my age are behind me, buying beer and supplies for what looks like a weekend at the lake. One of the guys, who I recognize from around town (maybe even from school), offers to pay for my groceries. I decline and make two more attempts with my debit card. I then ask the cashier to suspend my transaction and head to the ATM a few feet away.

My account balance was 27 cents.


What the fuck did you spend with my debit card???

I go back to the register and aplologize that I cannot pay for my food. The guy behind me offers to pay for my bill again. I don't know if it was out of frustration or out of pure shock that someone was willing to do that for me, but I let him pay. I thanked him a few times and went to get Truman and the groceries in the car.

I see the guy and his friends getting into his truck, with a boat attached to it. He drives over toward me and talks to me for a minute. He said that he knows that things "can get hard when you work" and try to take care of your family. He was happy to do that for me since he was on vacation. He also said "God Bless" before he left.

What this guy did for me amazed me to the point where I forgot about how mad I was at Brian for taking my debit card. I didn't even bring that up to him when I got home. I will never forget what this guy did for "saving" me that day. He is a modern day good samaritan and I wish for the day that I can find this guy and thank him once again for helping me.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

2010 Video Music Awards: A Retrospect

For those who just want to know what happened at the VMA's, but not sit though it... here is my play-by-play of the night.

The show begins with Eminem peforming "Not Afraid," which leads into Rihanna appearing onstage to begin "Love the Way You Lie." This was an excellent start to the show. Rihanna looked gorgeous and both her and Eminem sounded great.

Chelsea Handler starts the awards with a small skit of random rappers and other black guys smacking her ass. Then Lindsay Lohan gives her a No drinking pep talk before smacking her ass too. Chelsea does the usual semi-roasting of some of the nominees and other celebrities when onstage.

Lady Gaga's "Bad Romance" wins Best Female Video. Her acceptance speech was a little emotional. She thanks Alexander McQueen (RIP) and the gays that came with her to the show.

30 Seconds to Mars "Kings and Queens" wins Best Rock Video. They thank the fans and their families for the honor of winning the awards.

Justin Beiber performs on a stage outdoors. For a teen hearttrhob, he got the female appeal. But as an artist, he was disappointing. Not a long performance for one, and it focused more on his dancing and his drum solo. Meh.

Usher performs a medley of his songs from his latest cd. Amazing light show and great dance moves. I am getting a little curious if he was lip synching... he didn't sound out of breath when singing after all his dancing. Just saying...

Eminem's "Not Afraid" wins Best Male Video. He was not present to accept the award, since he was headed to NYC for a performance in the morning.

Florence and the Machine performs... and I have discovered an artist that I want to hear more of. This woman is amazing! Download the song "Dog Days are Over" NOW!!!!!

Travie McCoy performs "Billionaire" going into the commercial break. Ok, it looked like a commercial break. Now they cut to the outdoor stage where Ciara was performing. Are they just giving us teaser performances??? What the heck?

Lady Gaga wins her second Moonman for Best Pop Video. Again for Bad Romance. Her outfit, which I think was another Alexander McQueen piece, looked like the Statue of Liberty but in all black. I thought it looked good, even if it was too heavy for her to walk in, lol

Taylor Swift peforms. First thing is a video of what happened with her and Kanye from last year's VMA's. Then it fades to this room that looked like an abandoned, old house, where her and her bandmates were sitting. Taylor looks very elegant. Creamy white dress, short hair, and red lipstick... very 1940's look.

Drake's performance starts of with Mary J. Blige... she looks and sounds amazing. No offense to you Drake, you are a good artist and all, but I was digging Miss Blige way more than you.

Evan Rachel Wood and Joe Magnarelli present the technical award winners. Hehe... got my True Blood fix before watching the season finale!

Mini performance of Jason Derulo's "Riding Solo."

Jersey Shore cast sitting in a jacuzzi onstage. Suprise, suprise.

Eminem wins for a second time. Best Hip Hop Video for "Not Afraid"

B.O.B. performs. He starts of with Bruno Mars for "Nothing on You," then joins Hayley Williams for "Airplanes!" I HAD to turn up the volume!!! Then Hayley moves on to sing "The Only Exception" with her Paramore bandmates. Beautiful lighting... an orange hue that resembled stars in the sky.

Justin Beiber wins Best New Artist. I knew he would win because all the people texting were the teen girls.

Linkin Park performance. Sounds like they are transitioning to a newer sound. Still techno sounding, but different than before. And darker. Not as secular as before, leaning toward religious in the lyrics. But it works... and I'm liking it.

Teaser of the movie Burlesque... yep. Knew that would creep up somewhere.

Ah, Cher is at the VMA's... dressed in her "If I Could Turn Back Time" outfit. She presents the VMA for Video of the Year.... Lady Gaga's "Bad Romance." Gaga's emotional, announced her new album would be called "Born this Way." Then, she sings a few lines... I WANT HER ALBUM NOW!!!!!

Kanye wraps up the show. Wearing a candy apple red suit and black shirt. He's performing a new song. I like the song... it's a more personal one, about love. He even had ballerinas dancing onstage. Classy touch. And he ended the performance with some pyrotechnics. Not bad Kanye... not bad.

Well, there's the VMA's in a nutshell. I would like to say that Deadmau5 did a great job with being the the DJ for the night. I found out he will be in Kansas City next month and I just might have to go.

No suprises this year.... that kinda sucked.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

September 11, 2001

I will never forget where I was when I first heard the news that changed America.

I was a senior in high school. It was between 1st and 2nd hour. I ran into my friend Amarisa while we were heading toward our classes. She said she was in the nurse's office when they saw the breaking news on the television. It was right after the first plane hit the World Trade Center.

As soon as I walked into my newspaper class, I find my friend Bazigha, who was one of the few Muslim students in the school, not to mention a very sweet girl. After I wish her a Happy Birthday, I tell her about the breaking news. We ask Mr. Russell to turn on the television so we can watch, but he declines, since we were on deadline for Friday's publication. So Bazigha and I sat on the yearbook side of the journalism lab, since Mrs. Thompson had her tv on. We couldn't hear it, but was able to watch through the windows and try to break down what was happening. We had no idea what was being speculated about who was behind this attack.

After newspaper.... all normal classroom activities ceased.

Yes, we went from one class to another like we did every day, but our agenda was either watching the footage on tv (yes, my school had a television in every classroom, with cable) or we were all discussing the events that happened. I loved how my Spanish teacher, Mrs. Urquilla, made sure we knew the facts about the events. She was very smart in making sure that the biases and judgements were avoided.

When I got home from school that afternoon, I immediately turned on the television. Having missed the footage from when both towers of the World Trade Center was hit, I was finally able to catch it. It made my entire body chill (and still does today). I continued to watch my tv until at least midnight, maybe one in the morning. I didn't care about sleeping for school the next day.... this was more important.

The following couple weeks were interesting, to say the least. My friend Bazigha had to be escorted to her classes because some of the students were showing hatrid and anger toward her. The football team had a very touching tribute before the September 14th game. A few of the student groups had decided to sell t-shirts honoring 9/11/01, also setting up boxes for donating clothes, food, and medical supplies. I started saving magazines that featured the events: People, Entertainment Weekly. I started watching the news on a daily basis (which I've heard that tragedies usually trigger non news watchers to convert... and I continue to watch the news every day).

The following semester, the end of my senior year, I was in my Current Events class and our teacher had us watch a documentary. It was supposed to be about how a rookie becomes a firefighter. It ended up becoming a very touching piece about the events of September 11 as they were happening. I proudly own this documentary and I watch it every year. Of all the videos, tributes, and compilations out there... THIS is the best one. There are no biases, no political agendas behind it. It's just real.

I will never forget what happened on September 11, 2001

Tearjerker Moments

What makes good movies and tv shows is a combination of things: story, characters, and a connection to the audience. As a female, I tend to like certain movies that are not the best, but connect with me in a very emotional way. There are moments where I literally am brought to tears. Some are based on the loss of a character, some are when two people finally make that ultimate commitment to one another, or when someone truly gets something they deserve. Here are my tearjerker moments.

Harry's Ultimate Sacrifice in Armageddon:

Yea, the speech he said to Grace didn't really affect me, but it got me in the "teary mode." So by the time he gets flashbacks of Grace as a kid, I was there. This was also the first time I cried at a movie on a date (yes he cried too).

Monica and Chandler get Engaged on Friends:

Ok, I really wanted to post the actual proposal clip, but due to copywright/ embedding issues, I couldn't. But the whole concept of Monica realizing what Chandler was doing and surpising him with the apartment full of candles was just sooo awesome. Even though she couldn't go through with it and Chandler did the proposing... it was just perfect and romantic as hell!

Denny's Death on Grey's Anatomy:

Denny and Izzie... so close to true happiness. This exact scene is what I picture when Snow Patrol's "Chasing Cars" is playing. What gets me the most about this is what Izzie was saying before Alex picks her up off the bed. Even though they didn't know each other long, the feelings were strong. And to my Grey's fans, we saw how long it took for her to recover from this.

Extreme Makeover Home Edition:
There have been SEVERAL episodes that get me teared up when they get to the part where the house is revealed to the families. I sometimes have to avoid this show just because of that.

Big tells Carrie She's the One in Paris:

Yes, it was highly predictable that Big and Carrie would end up together, but when Big finally says "Carrie, you're the one," I was losing it. And then again less than a minute later when Carrie reunites with the girls in their "spot."

Proposal/Wedding from A Walk to Remember:

This one is a new development when it comes to the crying. I have seen this movie dozens of times but when I watched it about a month ago, I was having to rub my eyes. Funny how certain things that happen in your personal life can affect how you react to a movie...

Relizing John Doe is George on Grey's Anatomy:

As soon as Meredith said "007" I did one of those "eyes get really wide and my hand covers my mouth" moves before the tears came. And kept coming until the credits rolled. NO!!!! Not George. This one still gives me that chill every time I watch the clip.

The End of Toy Story 3:
Obviously I don't have video for this one because it's still in theaters! I don't want to spoil the ending for those who haven't seen it yet, but the last several minutes had tears running down my cheeks.

And here's a list of movies where I came close to crying (or would have if I didn't know the ending beforehand)
-Marley and Me, when Marley is put to sleep (knew the ending)
-Titanic, when Rose realizes Jack was dead (I know... shocking. I didn't cry)
-The Holiday, when Amanda decides to run back to Graham after already heading to the airport
-William Shakespeare's Romeo + Juliet, when Romeo realizes Juliet is alive after he took the poison
-The Green Mile, when John Coffey is executed (knew the ending)
-Stepmom, when Isabel and Jackie have that talk toward the end of the film

So... if anyone ever thought that I am a robot when watching movies.. I have proved you wrong! Now, what movies make you get weepy???

Friday, September 10, 2010

I Heart These Men!

Ok, I admit it.... I'm boy crazy. Always have been.

At any given time, I have a crush on at least 2-3 guys. But in the world of fictional characters... dozens. Characters from books I read, movies I watch, and from tv shows. It's easier to crush on the fictional ones, since you see how they interact with others from an outsider's standpoint... not to mention that a lot of those characters are written to be appealing.

You ready to see who gets my heart all a flutter???

Oh, Ferris.... I have loved you since I was 4 or 5 years old! You are fearless, ruthless, confident, and know how to think outside the box! You are an expert with technology, especially when hacking into the school's computer and faking your illness with your stereo system. You are extremely popular but you know who your true friends are and rely on them for help. You also share many good philosophies to others. Like you said "Life moves pretty fast. If you dont stop and look around once in a while, you may miss it."

Yes, I know he dies.. BUT... IT'S, DENNY DUQUETTE!!! He's extremely flirtatious and funny, despite the fact that he's scared of hospitals. If I worked in the medical field and met a guy like this, I would probably fall for him too. I would enjoy playing board games with him to pass the time. Every time I hear "Chasing Cars" by Snow Patrol, I feel my heart tug a little... not kidding.

Gee... I have a crush on another movie geek. Who would have thought? ;-) I was upset when Randy was killed in Scream 2 and was overjoyed at his brief, unexpected appearance in Scream 3. Randy, myself, a pile of movies, and cuddling on a couch... I'm good!!!

Holden Mc Neil is extremely passionate about his work and of life. He also wasn't afraid to express that he fell for Alyssa. Yes, he got her. When her sexual past came out in the open, he struggled with it but was willing to overlook it, even try to expand his sexual boundaries for her. Someone who is basically willing to do anything to keep the woman he loves is highly attractive to me. Holden... you are a great man!

I love a guy with a great sense of humor... and Chandler definately has that! His one liners are just too awesome that I find myself quoting them from time to time. He also has a good heart that's seen too many bad relationships... all he needed was to find the right one.

Oh, Aiden. Sweet, caring, kindhearted. You would make any girl happy. You are a romantic and didn't just want to jump in the sack... very admirable trait. You also see the beauty of nature, whether it was a piece of furniture you created or spending time at your home out in the country. You enjoyed the simple things in life, even in the biggest city in America.

The love letters, restoring the house, random dancing in the street... all of it just makes me melt. Noah Calhoun is an all around wonderful man. He actually reminds me of my Grandpa Savory soooo much. Noah and Allie had complete love and trust for one another and spent their lives expressing that to the fullest. If I found someone like Noah, I wouldn't want to let go.

Wow... after writing this, my head is up in the clouds. LOL

Monday, September 6, 2010

**Spoiler Alert*** This Blog is about Religion

"Donnie, an atheist is someone who denies altogether the existence of God. You're an agnostic. An agnostic is someone who believes that there can be no proof of the existence of God, but does not deny the possibility that God exists." -Donnie Darko

I was watching that movie back in April. Now I've seen this movie many times but to me, it's one of those films that the more times I watch it, the more I understand things. This time around, it got my mind working about religion. Yes, that may seem odd, but I was happy that it did. Then, last night, I got into a very interesting discussion with my friend Matt about religion. We covered a lot of stuff, from breaking down each denomination of Christianity to fundamentalist groups. It was very pleasant to me that he and I seemed to have a lot of similar beliefs and that we could discuss religion without feeling like we were going to offend one another.

My personal journey on finding where I am religiously has taken me years, even decades. I still don't have all the answers, but I feel comfortable with where I stand.

I am an agnostic.

I know that this may come as a shock to many of you, especially to my family and the friends that I went with to their churches. A lot of my extended family are very religious, and I love them for that. But for me, I have to go with what my heart tells me.

My Mom's side of the family was raised Catholic. My Dad had been raised Baptist by his mom and his dad was Episcopalian. I have attended all of those churches, as well as Presbyterian, RLDS (aka Community of Christ), and Christian Non-Denominational. I've compared each one. For the most part, they were the same (I mean, they all read the Bible, take communion, and bring people together). The only one that I was even remotely interested in possibly joining was Catholicism, and that was when I was going to college in St. Louis... which was a Catholic based University.

When I was a teen, my Mom was taking a human sexuality class and part of the course had to do with religion and homosexuality. They broke down the Bible and compared current prints with ones from before the sexual revolution. The discovery that the Bible was altered to condone homosexuality blew my mind. At first I was appauled that people would alter the word of God to fit into what's going on in the world. Then, I thought it through and realized that this was definatly not the first time something like this has happened. People have always altered or changed things to either protect someone or to deny something. Why would the Bible be any different?

That realization then made me question organized religion in general. If the people who pen copies of the Bible alter the info and Pastors preach those copies, then who is to say that we are really getting the true word of God? I just see way too many flaws there. I would much rather do my own research for the truth. I just feel you need to explore things for yourself, make your own discoveries. You don't have to follow the crowd... that's the beauty of free will.

There's also the whole science vs. God controversy. Scientists continue to reserch and discover more of how our planet works, how things came to exist. This does anger many, since it contributes to prove that God didn't create everything, or didnt exist at all. To me, knowledge is a powerful thing. The more you know about something, the more understanding you will be about life. So I support scientific research. Nothing wrong with that, especially since medicine is part of that research.

What does anger me about some religion is focused on the fundamentalist groups, especially with groups like the Westboro Baptist Church. That group exists more out of fear and hatrid than out of love and forgiveness. Some of it is also focused on ignorance. I just sometimes struggle to believe that some of their followers think that it's ok to expose harm to the world using religion as their reason behind it. It's groups like this that also contribute to the fact that I believe you should explore things on your own.

Just because I am agnostic doesn't mean that I will avoid talking about religion. I actually like discussing it, and with all kinds of people. I even love studying all aspects of religion. I spent many hours in newspaper class talking to one of my friends who is Muslim, and we enjoyed comparing each other's beliefs. I was thrilled when she brought the Qu'ran to school one day. Same goes with my friend Amarisa. I love hearing about her Mormon beliefs; it just fascinates me in the same way that I was when learning about new things in grade school. I would love to go on a vacation to Europe someday and visit the oldest churches in existance. A lot of my favorite books, movies, and tv shows revolve around religion or have religious aspects.

Books- Angels and Demons, The DaVinci Code
Movies-Dogma, The Green Mile, Boondock Saints, Saved!
Television- Big Love, True Blood

Ok, so I may not be the typical agnostic. But that's ok with me. Like I said, I am still doing some self-discovery. But at least I will know that whenever it comes time for me to leave this world, I will know that I stood true to my own beliefs and that I was happy.

Friday, September 3, 2010

The World Will NOT End December 21, 2012.... I Have Proof!

If you actually believe that the events portrayed in the movie 2012 is going to happen in a little over two years, please let me know who you are so I can forget that I know you. Or I will be nice and just kick your ass. Yes, the Mayans do have that date specified, but to mark the end of a cycle, not the end of the world. This is probably one of the most misinterpreted historical facts out there.


I do have an interesting perspective on when the end of the Mayan calender is actually supposed to happen. And it's nowhere near December 21, 2012. Just hear me out on this, you might learn a thing or two along the way.

-In Christianity, the years 666 and 1313 were omitted because of the satanic beliefs behind them. So now I wonder if the current date and time we all go by is based on that or not. If so... then we need to set our calanders back to 2008.

-On October 5, 1793, there was a decree implementing the start of leap year, also adding a leap day every four years. Since 1793, we have had
54 leap days. If we add in the 2 years we omitted from the Christian beliefs, we will have one more before 2012. So now we take those 55 leap days and figure that into the Mayan Calender.

-The Mayan Calender dates back to 6th Century BC. We are now in the 21st Century. If the Mayans didn't factor in a leap day (which I assume they didn't) then there should have been 678 leap days accounted for since 6th Century BC. Since we have factored in the 55 from listed above, then that would mean there is another 623 days that are not accounted for.

So what does my research lead me as far as figuring out when the end of the Mayan Calander SHOULD be?

Ok, I really suck at Math so I am just going to give you an estimated time.

I calculated that we are 4 years and 5 months behind, so that would make the end of the Mayan Calender to occur....

Sometime in April 2017.

Yes, I am aware I am full of shit.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Earthquake Insurance

I have a question for all my Midwestern friends and family... How many of you are paying for earthquake insurance? I bet I will have a hard time finding someone who does. The scary thing is that we all SHOULD be paying for it, since we live in the area with the biggest fault line in the continental United States: The New Madrid Fault line.

When looking up facts on, I discovered that the New Madrid Fault line, centrally located in New Madrid, MO... which is just North of the bootheel, has produced four (yes four) of the largest earthquakes in North America. These four happened between December 1811 and February 1812. The following video describes the chronological timeline of these quakes:

Yes, these quakes caused a lot of major damage. There were thousands of aftershocks, some still felt years later. The city of New Madrid was completely destroyed. There were landslides, collapsed riverbanks, trees were uprooted, and parts of the Mississipi River created waterfalls (and at Kentucky Bend, Reelfoot Lake was formed).

This could have been worse.

How, do you say? Let me explain.

That was back in the early 1800's, when everyone had a home sitting on acres of farmland. This was before skyscrapers, highways and subdivisions. Once we entered the Industrial Revolution, everything changed.

I want everyone to find the closest window and look outside. Do you see everything out there? Imagine all of that destroyed in just seconds. That is very possible for our future.

Sometime last year, I was watching the Weather Channel around one or two in the morning. It was an episode of "It Could Happen Tomorrow." Guess what the topic was? Yep. The New Madrid Fault line. I found some of the episode, however, I wasn't allowed to embed it. Please watch this. There are 3 videos in a row, totaling about 5-6 minutes.

Now do you understand why I think the ones in 1811/1812 could have been way worse? If you think what happened during Hurricane Katrina and the aftermath with FEMA was bad... just wait. This will be 10 times worse, easily.

FEMA did file a report back in 2008 warning that having a serious earthquake measuring 7.7 or higher would "result in the highest economic losses due to a natural disaster in the United States, further predicting "widespread and catastrophic" damage across Alabama, Arkansas, Illinois, Indiana, Kentucky, Mississippi, Missouri and particularly Tennessee. It would cause damage to tens of thousands of structures affecting water distribution, transportation systems, and other vital infrastructure." Even one of my local new stations did a small story on it.

The popularity for keeping up with this fault line has generated its own website.

It is extremely informative. Everything you want or need to know can be found here. It logs daily quakes, addresses predictions, and even allows you to share information on Facebook. I will be referring to this site from time to time.

Now that I've made my point... how many of you are logging onto your insurance sites and getting quotes on Earthquake insurance???

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

A Dozen Laughs

Whoever said laughter is the best medicine was a genius! When life will throw many things at you that you cant control, you have to find a way to bring a few giggles in the mix of things. Laughter is a great mood booster, especially on those average, mediocre days where nothing really exciting happens. You go to bed thinking that your day was above par. Your fellow movie geek has decided to share her 12 favorite comedies that always make me smile (even laugh out loud after viewing it many, many times).

Knocked Up:

I love this movie so much because I can relate to it, except that when I got knocked up, I had been with the guy for a few months. Judd Apatow was a genius for casting this amazing group of actors for this movie. Without that combination, I don't think it would have worked as well as it did comedically. When Alison and Ben are at their first appointment, the doctor examines Alison's vaga-jay and said "Well, you really do look like your sister." That line made me laugh so hard that I think I finally stopped when Ben and Pete are on their Vegas adventure. This also makes me wonder if Judd Apatow and Leslie Mann Google their daughters ailments as well (and yes, that was both of thier kids in the film).

Office Space:

What isn't funny about this movie??? TPS Reports, Milton, pieces of flair, and "O" faces. It's full of great one liners, which I have found myself in the middle of a quote war numerous times. I also have my own personal stash of flair, although I think I have more than 37 pieces, lol. I was going to be a Chotcky's employee for Halloween this year, but I was overruled by a better costume idea.

The Hangover:

Another movie full of one liners! What would we do without Alan?? Or Mr. Chow? Or the fact that the drug dealer accidently gave them roofies? We would get a boring Bachelor party with only alcohol and strippers... and that would have been very sad indeed.

Big Daddy:

This is my favorite Adam Sandler flick. It made me laugh and it almost made me cry (like when they take Julian away from Sonny, also Sonny's speech in court). It also makes me want to eat at Hooters every time I watch it. Oh, and make a trip to Toronto someday. Plus, it has Steve Buscemi in it (totally love him, hehe)

Clerks II:

I cant have a favorite comedies list without some mandatory Kevin Smith! Even though the first one was awesome, I thought this one was a lot funnier. Transformers vs. Gobots, Star Wars vs. LOTR, cameos by Ben Affleck and Jason Lee, and the shit that Randall gets himself into (Hello dumbass, Kelly is a gender neutral name). Rosario Dawson, I have always loved your work and I was very pleased with you jumping into the Smith bandwagon! Bravo chica!!!

Dumb and Dumber:

I first watched this when I was 12. It still makes me laugh my ass off, so much that I cant take Jeff Daniels seriously when watching Pleasantville. I do recommend getting the unrated version of this movie... extra scenes and extended ones! Oh, and Harry's bathroom scene.... I can't even think of it without laughing!


Never F*ck with people who handle your food. As someone who works in the restaurant industry, I can tell you that there are customers like that out there. With that said, I have NEVER gone further than bitching about a customer to coworkers... no extra "gravy" on their plates! If you have worked in a restaurant or fast food place before, you just have to appreciate this movie!

Forgetting Sarah Marshall:

Did I ever mention that I am in love with Jason Segel? This movie did it for me. The whole breakup scene/aftermath was just so... real. The little things Peter did to make Sarah smile ("I've got a suprise for you... *slapping penis noise), the way he cried over the tupperware she bought for his cereal (I cried over a guy because I saw a Star Wars toy commerical once), and how he just had to get away to move on... that's as real as it gets. Add Russell Brand and you've got a hilarious breakup movie.

Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me:

Yea Baby!!! Gotta love the first one, but The Spy Who Shagged Me gave us Mini Me, Fat Bastard, Rob Lowe as a younger Number 2, and Felicity! The banters between Dr. Evil and Scott crack me up all the time. And I am a whore for color, and this movie just brings out color by the truckload. Fun Fact: all the material for the costumes came from some shop here in Kansas City... I remember watching the news story about it!


MUST. SEE. CHRISTMAS. MOVIE. I don't care if you hate Will Ferrell, this one can be your exception. Great story! It will melt your heart and make you have many fits of laughter! Zooey Deschanel was amazing in this, but what ISNT she good in??? UH, nothing!

Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back:

I have a soft spot for movies that pay homage to other movies... and Kevin Smith did me proud, 10 times over! Not only did he incorporate all his movies, but he got a lot of the Miramax/Dimension films to share a role with this movie. And cameos galore!!! A note to Jay... stop asking me to f*ck you. Not going to happen. You have Justice, you know, when she's released from prison.

American Pie:

Ah, memories of high school. NO, I didn't screw baked goods. But I did learn some really good things from this movie, especially about watching your beer at a party, band camp's lessons in sex ed, and that you could become a sex legend by sleeping with someone's mom.

Now that you guys are done laughing... I am going to watch one of these movies. Maybe two, lol

Writer's Block

I've been staring at the laptop screen for about two hours now. I really havent been doing anything besides the occasional comment on Facebook or "liking" someone's status. I'm having a moment where my brain feels like it's turning to mush. This is a moment where I am having writer's block.

For someone who loves to write, like me, having nothing to write about is complete torture. I want to be able to write about something, anything! I have millions of ideas floating in my head on any given day, but when I sit down to actually start processing those ideas, I cant. It's frustrating as hell. So what do I do? I get on Facebook, Twitter or read other blogs from my friends, hoping some phrase or idea inspires me. When that doesnt work and I realize, once again, I zoned out for another 10-15 minutes, I get up from my desk and look around my room.

I walk over to my bookcase and look at my books. I search my DVD's to find some movie that I feel will bring out some creative thoughts. Sometimes I will pick out a musical, like Moulin Rouge or Chicago (but that doesn't always work because I end up just watching the movie and singing/dancing to it. Right now, I am watching Alice in Wonderland (Tim Burton version). Ok, I am kind of watching it... more like listening to it and taking an occasional glance at my tv.

When that doesn't work either, I just start thinking random blog ideas. Should I do a blog about my new job? No... maybe in a couple weeks. Should I write about the new strip club laws? No... too many of my friends have blogged about it or posted stuff on Facebook. Even I have posted at least a dozen times the past few months about it, so there would be nothing new for me to write about. Anything else political that I want to blog about? No... nothing is standing out for me that I want to rant over. Truman? No... as much as I love my Mini Me, I can't seem to get any good inspiration for writing about him.

So I am stuck.

Stuck with a million thoughts and ideas in my head, but no outlet.